Aquarius season arrived mid-weed last week, but don’t worry, there’s a whole lot of time left for the sun to be in Aquarius and make life weird for all of us. Far gone are the days of Capricorn season, where you may have tried to make a life-changing resolution and cried about how your bank account shrunk after the holidays. It’s time to forget those earthly desires—and when aliens come down from the sky and invite you on board their ship, join them. There are no jobs, no U.S. dollars up there. You will truly find happiness there.
Aries
There's been a lot going on in your mind recently. You have so many things you want to accomplish, but you don’t know if you will be able to get everything done. You may not even know where you want to go next in life. Instead of cracking under all this pressure, your emotions will boil up inside you until you break out into a solo musical dance number. Through the course of the song, you will figure out what is truly most important to you. And hey, you might also get a really cool transformation makeover. This worked for Troy Bolton, so it’s sure to work for you too.
Taurus
Work has been a bit of a drag recently. You’re working hard but it just doesn’t seem like you’re getting noticed. Well, this is the perfect time to make yourself noticed. Challenge your boss to a duel and if you win, you take their job. They will have to accept because their pride is on the line. This is your chance to make it big.
Gemini
You will receive two free plane tickets to Bali in the mail. It looks suspicious, but you go anyways—an adventure is an adventure, right? When you land, you will be greeted by a fancy-looking man who then tells you that you were asked to come to this island to try and find a long lost treasure. This is obviously shady business, but you take the job. You may die in a tomb, but you may get a few bits of the treasure so it’s worth it.
Cancer
While being responsible and cleaning out some drawers, you will find a strange-looking envelope in the pile of forgotten mail you need to go through. The envelope consists of an invoice for a lot of money that your grandparents owed after their failed attempt at a bouncy castle business back in the ‘90s. The grace period is almost over and it turns out that everyone in your family decided (without you knowing about any bouncy castles at all) that you are the one to take the full brunt of paying off this debt. You can’t trust anyone it seems. Also don’t ever start a family business.
Leo
Love is in the air and someone is in love with you. That’s right, you have a secret admirer. Is it endearing (and someone you reciprocate feelings for), or is it really weird? Only you can decide.
Virgo
You are in much need of some time off this month, but I know it’s hard for you to justify taking that time for yourself—you’re just so important after all. It turns out that when you give yourself a good, maybe five days of vacation that wasn’t scheduled three years in advance, you may have just ruined the entire world economy. But that’s on them. Other people should be more prepared for your absence.
Libra
Pete Davidson is going to be in your town for some reason, and he’s going to see you in passing, run up to you, and then ask you out. You have to say yes. He’s dating Kim K. and he’s about to ruin all that he has to be with you. If you’re in a relationship before this, you aren’t anymore. It cannot be helped.
Scorpio
Take some time to find yourself this month. Go into a small, dark space in your home (such as a closet) and just sit there for a while. Open the door when you feel ready and find yourself in an alternate magical universe where your sibling sold you out to an evil witch for some candy. Now you need to find your way back home. But do you want to go home?
Sagittarius
This is the perfect time to call the girls together for one last hurrah. That’s right, it’s time to heist.
Capricorn
There is a tiny little man who has taken to following you around. You can’t see him because he is just so, so small, but he is there. This little man is very tiny but full of mischief, so be careful. He is going to try and play various pranks on you. When you fall victim to his prank, you both may come out with a little laugh, but you may also get seriously hurt because your body just isn’t what it used to be. Make sure to have a little bit saved up in case that happens.
Aquarius
Happy birthday, little Aquarius!. Things may have been going rough recently, but as one Gabriella and Troy once said: it’s the start of something new. When swimming in the ocean (how you get there, I cannot tell you), a group of dolphins will find you and persuade you to follow them. At first, you think that they are trying to lure you to your death, but you soon learn that they are leading you to a beautiful underwater kingdom. You can breathe underwater somehow. You are invited to stay there forever, and you will thrive.
Pisces
While cooking, you hear a soft voice. There’s no one else home but you so you get a little worried. The voice continues, saying, “Look over here!” and things like that. You finally realize that your spice bottles can talk. After being silent observers for years, they have some observations about the friends and family that have spent time in your kitchen, and these spices have some spicy things to say. Listen to them—what reason would a spice lie to you?
Gosh this is the exact thing I needed to read for my Aquarius/ Pisces heart, yes I am in "the cusp" of all water signs and shnaaz.